{Eargasm Friday | Jada Tribute} – Mos Def “Umi Says”

51sne9Cls0L

My precious daughter would have been 8-years-old today and as I think about our time together, I can’t help but remember the songs that became our soundtrack. 

I played music for her throughout my pregnancy. Jadabug’s favorite emcees were Mos Def and her father, 7evenThirty (Marq). Both artists had a completely different effect on her. It felt like Jada was doing somersaults every time I played Mos but when she heard her father’s voice, a stillness came over her. She would instantly stop moving as if she was studying Marq’s voice, analyzing every word and sound. It was a fascinating experience!

Marq and I would sing “Umi Says” to Jada every night when she was in NICU. She had this uncanny ability of knowing exactly when we were planning to leave the hospital. She would scrunch her face, turn red, and cry. Broke our hearts! We figured out that if we lowered our voices and sang a song, Jada would ease off to sleep, allowing us to tip-toe away. (We learned fairly quickly that trickery is a fair tactic if the outcome is a sleeping baby!)

So here’s to you, my little one! Continue to shine your light on all of us, forever and ever more.

{fly to da sun}

 

 

 

 

Advertisements

Jada-Dilla Weekend

Jada-Dilla Weekend
(l to r) 1. Me holding my precious nephew (photo by Brice Media); 2. A sweet ladybug visited us during Jadabug’s balloon release; 3. My dope cousin and me at Dilla Day – Jxn (photo by Poet Williams); 4. The flyer I designed for Dilla Day at OffBeat

I realized that I haven’t made a post in a few days –  I think I’m still recovering from my Jada-Dilla Weekend! It was absolutely wonderful; full of nostalgic food, balloons, fly hoodies, bright skies, ladybugs, family, friends, and {love}! I’m so grateful to celebrate my daughter in such a positive way. I’m also grateful to have hung out in the {dopeness} that is OffBeat – a cool, quirky, wonderful alternative store that sells everything I adore. (Records, vinyl toys, magazines – Oh my!) OffBeat hosted Dilla Day – Jxn and I can’t tell you the number of times I lost my ENTIRE cool every time a beat dropped. Dilla would be proud! Shout out to DJ Young Venom, DJ Brik a Brak, and DJ Sketch for keeping the spirit of J Dilla alive and well. Check out the OffBeat website, http://offbeatjxn.com/.

I’m full off the energy I received…so full and eternally grateful. {blessings}

Eargasm Friday | Jada – Dilla Edition – 7evenThirty “God” feat. Laurie Walker & Erykah Badu “Telephone”

Jada-Dilla-Eargasm

Welp, it’s Friday! Yesterday was Jada’s bday and tomorrow is J-Dilla’s bday so I’ve dubbed this weekend, Jada – Dilla weekend. With that in mind, Eargasm Friday will have a double feature – “God” by 7evenThirty feat Laurie Walker and “Telephone” by Erykah Badu. These songs mean so much to me and remind me of the lives that have inspired me the most. Blessings to those in the ancestral realm – you are my guiding light.

{peace, power, love}

Jada Michal Phillips – Divine Baby, Master Teacher

Jadabug_StaceyRobinson
Jadabug as illustrated by Stacey Robinson

7 years ago, today, I became a mother. After 10 arduous hours of labor, she was here – my love, my heart, my Jada. But…something was wrong and a week after her arrival my husband and I found out that her time on this earth would be short. Extremely short. It would be a miracle if she made it out of NICU. Her father, Marques aka 7evenThirty, and I surrounded her with love and positive energy. Our families surrounded us with love, stopping by the NICU almost daily just to hold and talk to Jada. Marq and I sang “Umi Says” and his song, “Star,” to her every night to calm her spirit and ease her to sleep. And so after almost two weeks of performing this ritual, she came home.

We had put so much effort into decorating her room that we couldn’t imagine her not ever gracing it. The day we brought her home was full of tears, fear, and gratitude. Our baby was home! Day by day she got better, accomplishing most of the things she shouldn’t have been able to do. We knew early on that this little girl was feisty and strong and wise beyond her years. Jada knew things and when she looked at you, she looked at you – through you- into your soul. She had a unique relationship with everyone she encountered; a certain game, a special noise – that one, signature thing she did with just you. She marked us.

Things started to take a turn for the worst. Marq and I were scared and hurt, but we couldn’t allow ourselves to give up on her. If Jada wanted to leave, it would be her choice. And so that time came when she made the decision to transition. She was 5 months and 3 weeks. My god! To say losing her was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do is a laughable understatement. I lost my mind, my sense of self, my heart, my reason for living. Who was I now? As a creative, nothing is more marvelous than creating another human being; and I had played an instrumental role in creating one of the most amazing human beings I’ve ever known. But she was gone.

So now, 7 years later, I’ve had to heal and find myself again. It’s actually hard to believe I would’ve had a 7 year old kid! But there are those moments when I can hear her special cry, recall her sweet smell, and remember her annoyed face (She made that face quite often!). Those memories remind me that she was, in fact, here and that I was actually a mommy.

I could go on and on about how incredibly dope Jada was – I mean she was the flyest of them all. But I’ll end it with this – she was and is my Master Teacher. I’ve learned more from her than anyone else in my life. She didn’t speak a single word but communicated so much to Marques and me. She is our guiding star and light…we will never be the same.

Fly on, Jadabug! Enjoy your new trip around the sun! 7 | divinity

Much love and respect to Stacey Robinson for creating a lovely illustration of Jada. He captured every little detail of our beautiful daughter! Check out more of Robinson’s work at http://staceyrobinson.tumblr.com/. {peace}